


Like The Terminator, In A Way

by cjmarlowe



Series: Life Is Waiting For You [13]
Category: Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: AU, Exhibitionism, Fucking Machines, M/M, Other, Voyeurism, kink bingo, roommates are the best and worst thing about college
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-31
Updated: 2010-08-31
Packaged: 2017-11-12 11:43:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/490522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjmarlowe/pseuds/cjmarlowe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Having sex with things that look like giant spiders—or possibly crabs—might not be the smartest thing to do, but they're just too curious not to try it out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like The Terminator, In A Way

"You're not funny!" Kris hears Anoop shout, and he thinks it's coming from outside his bedroom door, aimed at him, until he wakes up the rest of the way and realizes that it's coming from the back yard and it's just really loud. "This is not an appropriate gift!"

He yawns, stretches, and rolls out of bed to the window, shoving it open so he can poke his head outside. It's April but it's only a little cool, the sun already high enough that Kris is probably alone in the apartment. He only has afternoon classes on Thursdays, though, so he would've been up in plenty of time, shouting or no shouting.

"What'd Matt do this time?" he calls out the window.

Anoop looks over at him, gives him a little wave of acknowledgement, then bangs on the door to Matt's basement apartment again. "And if you had to give me sex toys, you could've at least picked something that doesn't require assembly."

As soon as he hears that, Kris decides he needs to hang out in his window and see this one through.

"And life-sized?" Anoop goes on, like he wants the whole neighborhood to know. "Really?"

Finally Matt opens his door, looking a lot more put-together than Kris is. "You just can't say thank you, can you?" he says, shaking his head like he's disappointed in him. "You're the one who's spent the last month talking about how he's never going to find a girl like the one he lost."

"This is not a girl like the one I lost!"

"No," agrees Matt. "I'm told it's even better. It's not life-sized, though. If they wrote that on the box, that's just false advertising."

"If _who_ wrote that on the box?" says Anoop. "Who even made this, Matt? Who even knows about this?"

Matt just gives him a blatant lie of a shrug. "It pays to have bored friends in Engineering," is all he admits to. "Have fun!"

He closes the door again, and Kris is pretty sure he's not coming back no matter how much Anoop continues to bang at it. Which is not to say that he doesn't try for at least five minutes.

"I hate you, Matt!"

"You love me!" Kris just barely hears Matt say through his own open window, and Anoop gives the door one final knock with his fist before taking a couple of steps back from it.

"Come on inside," says Kris before Anoop goes storming back upstairs in a huff. "I'll make breakfast. Or something. What time is it anyway?"

Anoop looks at his watch, then back at Kris apologetically. "Almost ten," he says. "Still breakfast hours."

"I have some questions to finish for my ethics class anyway," says Kris. "And I should shower at some point before I go out."

"Yeah, yeah all right," says Anoop, sounding grudgingly grateful for the invitation. He heads back upstairs to his own apartment first, though, and Kris uses the extra time to actually put on more than just the boxer shorts he sleeps in. He doesn't check himself out in the mirror because he already knows he's a mess of bedhead and sleep creases and it's his own home and his own kitchen so he doesn't feel that obligated to worry about it.

Anoop's always a good guest anyway, polite and helpful. When he's not making a scene in the back yard, anyway.

Kris makes bacon and eggs, because that's what they've got and because he can pretty much do that in his sleep. And because it's probably a cop-out to serve cereal and milk when you've invited someone over—even if it's just someone from the apartment upstairs—and said you're going to make something. Opening a box or a carton really does not constitute "make."

Anoop arrives right when Kris is finishing up, just throwing a couple of only-slightly-chipped plates on the table and sitting down to enjoy the fruits of his labors.

"So what was that about?" says Kris. "Did Matt finally follow through on his threat to buy you a blow-up doll?"

"It's not a blow-up doll," says Anoop. "A blow-up doll, I get that. Everyone gets a blow-up doll at some point."

"I never have."

"That's because nobody likes you," says Anoop, and quickly moves his plate away so Kris can't retract breakfast. "Anyway, it's _mechanical_."

"Like one of those Real Dolls?"

"You really know nothing about female-figured sex aids, do you?" Kris just shrugs unapologetically and picks up a piece of bacon with his fingers, eating half of it in one bite. "It's...I don't even know. A robot or something. Like I'm going to put a robot together and then have sex with it."

"But you have to put it together now," insists Kris. "I didn't go through all this just to never find out what's in the box. Come on, it'll be fun."

"I'm not sure fun's the word you're looking for," says Anoop, but he's curious. Kris can tell. Then again, who _wouldn't_ be curious about something like that? "I don't want to give Matt the satisfaction of appreciating this."

"Matt probably expects you to leave it in the box," says Kris. "I mean, you're not really known for being adventurous. If you really want to mess with him, you _should_ put it together."

"I'm pretty sure you're using reverse psychology on me right now," says Anoop, "but it's working."

"Just the facts," says Kris with a smile. "If I was using reverse psychology, I'd be telling you that I think it's probably too difficult for you to build anyway."

"You think it's too difficult for me to build?"

"I didn't say that," says Kris, "I was just providing a relevant example."

"I'm totally skilled enough to put it together," says Anoop. "If there aren't too many parts, I can probably have it done by the time you get home from class."

"That gives you a few hours," says Kris, glancing at the clock on the stove. He still has a shower to take and ethics questions to finish before he heads out, and time's passing faster than he thought. Maybe he can skip the shower. "It's probably not actually that complicated. No one likes to work that hard for sex."

"Maybe _you_ don't need to work hard for sex, but some of us are used to it," says Anoop.

"I think you just called me easy," says Kris. "Did you just call me easy?"

"No, I said that other people are easy _for_ you," says Anoop. "I wish I had your luck. Do you even know how long I've been trying to get with Megan?"

"Oh, I didn't know she'd told you about that."

Anoop just stares at him, until Kris figures out that she hadn't, actually. "My point exactly," he says finally, with a world-weary sigh. "Maybe I _should_ give the robot a chance."

Kris feels like maybe he should explain or something, but he doubts there's a right thing to say here. Anoop obviously already knows it was nothing serious, since Kris and Megan haven't been any different with each other afterwards. And the thing is, he thinks Megan _is_ into Anoop, in a way more long-term way than she was into Kris, but he can't really _say_ that, especially not right now.

"Well, it's going to be cool no matter what," he says eventually. "Even if it's not an actual robot."

"Knowing Matt's friends, it probably is," says Anoop. "I bet it even talks."

"Okay, that would be weird," says Kris. "Do you think it talks in Matt's voice?"

Anoop snickers over his breakfast, and Kris isn't sure if he just made the whole experience better or worse. He guesses they'll have to find out later.

"All right, I'm going to leave this for you to clean up and I'll call us even on the Megan thing," says Anoop, getting up from the table and stealing one more piece of bacon before he goes.

"And you're going to put together your awesome sex machine?"

Anoop sighs. "Yes," he says, rolling his eyes at him. Kris just grins back. "I'll see you later, Allen."

Kris does have to skip the shower in the end, but he makes it to campus on time with everything done and ready to go.

He can't help thinking about it all through class, though, and skips his planned trip to the library to head home again instead. Though he only stays home long enough to throw his messenger bag in his bedroom and steal half of Cale's bagel before he heads upstairs to Anoop's place.

"Tell me you put it together," he says when Anoop opens the door, looking like he hasn't gone out all day. It's a promising sign.

He rolls his eyes but lets Kris inside all the same. "Perv," he says, and Kris ducks his head and blushes a little but he's still curious. He can't help it. "It's in my room. I haven't...it's not _used_ or anything."

"Didn't have enough time yet?" says Kris cheekily. "Is it awesome?"

"It's got an inny _and_ an outy," says Anoop.

"So that's a yes, then," says Kris.

"Well, no offense, but only one of those is really my style," says Anoop. "I don't know what Matt was thinking."

"That you might want to broaden your horizons?" says Kris. "You don't have to be gay to like—"

"I'm just going to stop you right there," says Anoop. "That is definitely a conversation for another day." He's obviously feeling awkward already, but not quite enough that Kris feels like he ought to go before he gets a chance to see the thing.

"I don't really, you know, have a reputation, do I?" Kris asks him, though. That thought's been sort of sitting strangely with him all day too. The people who live with and around him know him better than most, but Kris thinks he's been pretty discreet about and with the people he's been with.

"Not really," Anoop admits grudgingly. "I was mostly just kidding, until the Megan thing. But you have to admit, you've got some game."

"I so don't," insists Kris. "I so, so don't." Most of the people he's been with he really has kind of fallen into it through no genuine effort of his own. It's when he makes an effort that things seem to go badly wrong, and when he's just himself with trying that things kind of fall into place. "Maybe a little more than I had in high school, but not a lot."

"All right," says Anoop, pushing open his bedroom door. "It looks like it's going to eat you or something, I swear. It probably _could_ eat you."

"But not you?"

"Well, you're smaller, it'll go for you first," says Anoop. "That's the real reason you're invited."

"I knew there was a catch," says Kris, even as he's kind of awed by the magnificent monstrosity on the floor.

There's a ring in the middle, with a number of buttons and dials and levers on it, and then two arms, one on each side. As Anoop said, and inny and an outy, adjustable—or so it looks—for height, direction and angle. It's not in any way elegant, but it's exactly what it says on the box. Literally.

"Well," he says after a moment of both of them staring at it. "Let's press buttons!"

"I haven't actually dared yet," admits Anoop, "but I promise it's put together exactly the way the directions said. Not that there was much actually putting-together to do, just attaching the bigger pieces. I had to buy batteries, though."

"A lot of batteries, I'm guessing."

"You have no idea," says Anoop. "If this was really a gift, the batteries would have been included."

"I'm not sure what it is," says Kris, kneeling down next to it, "but I want to press stuff."

It's not that Kris is completely comfortable with this either, it's not that he's suddenly blasé about all this. After all, there's a dildo on one side and some kind of suction cup on the other and it's all so explicitly and unapologetically sexual that it's a little bit like watching porn together. Diving right in and playing with it is an effort to make it normal, to make it easy.

And who doesn't like to press stuff?

Anoop looks dubious, but once Kris drops to his knees he seems to get on board with the plan, reaching out and turning one of the dials. Kris can't tell exactly what it does. But something inside the tube starts moving. Like a massaging motion. He's definitely intrigued.

"Turn it up higher," he says, and as Anoop does the motion gets faster and faster until Anoop finally shuts it off completely again and moves on to the button next to it. This one makes a very loud noise that Anoop immediately shuts off.

"Not using that one," he says. "For the record."

After exploring all the possibilities of one side, and being not entirely certain about what some of them are even really doing, they move on to the other. The attached—firmly attached; that's the first thing Kris checked—dildo is reasonably small. He figures there's probably a way to replace it but he doesn't need to worry about that right now. He adjusts it all over the place at first, pointing it in strange and improbable directions while Anoop laughs at him, then tries out some of the controls. They all make it move in various ways, thrusting or shaking or rotating in little circles.

Kris is definitely intrigued but the whole thing.

"So," says Kris finally. "Are we going to try it out?"

"For real?" says Anoop. "Like, actually...?"

"Well, why not?" says Kris. "We've come this far. We know what it does. We should, you know, give it a trial run. You can do one side and I can do the other. If you want."

"And by that you mean you'll take the outy and I'll take the inny, right?" says Anoop. "Because I'm really not sure about the other way around."

Kris thinks that maybe he'll change his mind out of sheer curiosity after he sees it in action, but if he doesn't, he doesn't. Kris hopes he gives it a shot, though. It doesn't have to mean anything other than what it is.

"We can do it together," says Kris. "Just you and me."

"Mr. Allen, are you trying to seduce me?"

Kris just shrugs and grins. "It'll be fun, right? It'll be an adventure. I promise it won't be weird."

"Why do I get the feeling you've said those exact words before?"

"Because I have, and I've been right," says Kris. It occurs to him that Anoop might be suggesting Kris gets around again, but when Kris _is_ with someone, he never lets it get weird. He just stays friends with them afterwards, which is probably why he's often surrounded by people he's at least made out with at some point.

"And if something goes badly wrong, we've each got a buddy to take us to the hospital."

"Okay, less encouraged now," says Anoop. "I'm still not sure it's not going to attack at any moment. That would be just like Matt."

"Matt may do many things," said Kris, "but he would never endanger another guy's junk. That's a line that none of us would ever cross." He's as certain of this as he is of anything. If this thing was going to do anything unexpected, it already would have. Either it's exactly what he says it is, or it's not going to do anything at all. "Maybe he's going to give you a questionnaire afterwards so see if you have any suggestions for his friends' prototype."

"Suggestion number one," says Anoop, "make it look a little less like a spider."

"It's more like a crab, really," says Kris, tilting his head to the side.

"Once again, not helping," says Anoop, but Kris is totally right. "So are we really going to do this?"

"Only if you want to," promises Kris. "You can always kick me out. I do have a home I can go back to, and you can try it all out yourself. Just promise you'll give me the highlights."

"No, I don't want to...I definitely don't want to _talk_ about it," says Anoop. "All right, we're already in this together, let's do it."

And then he stands there and waits until Kris smirks and gives in.

"You want me to go first, don't you?"

"I like to think of it as being a good host," says Anoop. "It would be rude to come first."

"That really only applies when you're actually having sex," says Kris, though his own personal definition of sex stretches pretty far. Probably far enough to cover this. "And _someone_ has to come first."

"If we were in your bedroom, I'd expect you to wait," says Anoop.

"I'll have to remember that," says Kris, and eyes the machine one more time then starts taking off his clothes. As much as they've just negotiated this, Anoop still seems a little surprised when Kris starts stripping, but he's committed now and he really does want to see this through. It might be terrible. But it might not, too. "We're going to need condoms."

"What? What for?"

"I have no idea where that thing's been," says Kris, "and I have a very high regard for my behind. You, um. Have some, right?"

Anoop does, an unopened box that he sheepishly fishes out of the drawer beside his bed. As if all of them don't have something like that by the bed, just in case, most of them probably less used than Anoop thinks they are. Kris is starting to think it's not so much him as Anoop thinking that everyone's getting more action than he is.

The awkward part is going to be getting naked in the first place. Sure, actually using the thing is going to be a little awkward, but you sort of forget to be self-conscious when you get into it. The first time you take your clothes off with someone—breakfast ambushes notwithstanding—is awkward. But they're alone, the two of them, and that's inside Kris's comfort zone so he just goes with it.

He figures once he does Anoop will follow, and he's not wrong, except that Anoop's underwear stays firmly on. Fair enough. They'll have to come off sooner or later anyway.

Kris looks around again, not really expecting to find what he's looking for but hoping there'll be a reasonable substitute.

"What is it?"

"I suppose lube's too much to hope for?" he says, on the slim chance that it's not.

Anoop can't supply lube but he does have lotion, which isn't the same thing but it'll do in a pinch, and Kris isn't exactly doing anything substantial here. He nods his thanks and pops it open, and he's kind of turned on and kind of awkward still, but once he starts fingering himself it's pretty much all turned on.

Anoop doesn't even pretend he's not staring, watching with rapt attention as Kris gets himself ready to try out the monster on the floor. He pulls his fingers out finally and wipes them on a tissue and then kind of stares at the condom-covered dildo.

"Well, what are you waiting for?"

"Come on, give me a second, this is kind of awkward," says Kris, adjusting the dildo until he thinks it's in the position he wants. "I'm not as experienced as you seem to think I am."

"But you've done this before, right?"

"Like, _once_ ," says Kris. Once with a real person, anyway. And he doesn't actually own a bona fide sex toy, but he's definitely thinking about investing in one if he can find a way to do it discreetly. Being out doesn't mean comfortable going dildo shopping.

"Really?"

"Apparently I've just blown my image as a sex guru," says Kris, which is definitely not such a bad thing. Much like dildo shopping, Kris still likes having sex more than actually talking about it outside of the bedroom. Or wherever.

He's slicked up now, and as stretched as he could make himself, and slowly he slides down onto the dildo until it's all the way inside him. Now it's time to play with the buttons and the levers and see what they feel like when it's actually inside him. He's glad it's not really big and not really deep, because he's really not sure what it's going to do.

The blue button is definitely to make it into a vibrator, which just isn't Kris's thing so he turns it off almost as quickly as he'd turned it on. The lever, the one that made the dildo move up and down when they were playing with them, does exactly what he thinks it will do—gives him complete control over the speed and depth of the dildo. But the next button, Kris thinks that's the one that he wants. Hands-free, all pumping all the time, with a dials for speed and strength adjustments. He can move his body to change the angle, but all the while it just keeps doing him, with no need to rest, no need to slow down or change position.

"Um," says Anoop, but Kris kind of ignores him now. He's aware of him being there, watching him, but he's not really a _part_ of this. This is Kris exploring his own body as much as it is Kris trying out this weird, not-exactly-pranky sex machine. This is Kris finding out just how fast and how hard he likes it when his own or someone else's exhaustion isn't a factor.

And the answer is pretty hard, and not really fast, it turns out.

When it's finally exactly right he stops playing with the controls and braces himself on one arm and reaches down to jerk himself off in time with the thrusts. Or actually, not at all in time with the thrusts but alongside them, a little faster and sharper, which is how he likes _this_.

Anoop is staring and Kris is giving him the show of a lifetime but it's just _so good_ now, exactly like he'd make someone do him if he had complete control. Of course it's missing the spontaneity factor, but it makes up for that by being _relentlessly hard_ until Kris sucks in a huge breath and coughs in surprise and comes hard over his fist.

And it _keeps_ going until Kris regains enough motor control to turn it off again.

Kris is wiped out and very happy when he finally climbs off, deals with the condom and tissues before Anoop can inspect them too closely and drags his boxers back on, if not the rest of his clothes.

"Okay, your turn," he says, "and there is no backing out now. I will lock that door if I have to."

Far from backing out, though, now that Kris has taken a turn on the ride Anoop seems really interested in what it can do for him. And much less self-conscious about showing his body off to Kris now. Kris guesses now that Anoop has seen him _that_ intimately, there's not a lot to be worried about anymore.

The underwear come off and he's definitely already hard, no working up to it, and checking out the other side of the machine. "Do you think I just stick it in there?"

"That seems logical," says Kris, still catching his breath. He runs his hand over his bare abdomen and his fingers slip through a sheen of sweat. "Unless you want to stick something else in there first."

Anoop does stick a couple fingers in first, maybe to see if it's going to spring any traps, but nothing happens. He takes advantage of the box of condoms, and Kris pretends not to notice how clumsily he puts it on; he remembers all too well when he struggled every time.

"Don't watch this part," says Anoop, and Kris pretends to look away but of course he still watches as Anoop carefully and uncertainly sticks it in. Anoop shamelessly watched him the whole time, after all.

He cups his cock through his shorts as he watches, but it's so spent it can only manage a little twitch even as he watches someone else have sex. Anoop forgets he's there before long, which Kris figured he would, and he tries out everything. _Everything_. Except the screeching button, which Kris can't blame him for.

Kris kind of loves the way Anoop's breath starts to hitch as he gets close to coming, as his breaths become shorter and jerkier and his ribcage twitches with each one. And the sounds he makes when he comes are kind of awesome too.

Anoop looks just as wrung out as Kris felt when he slips out of the machine, covering his cock with one hand and biting his lip. He looks spent and he looks like it's finally really dawning on him what he just did, or maybe what they just did. Or maybe he's thinking about just what he's going to say to Matt about his gift.

"Did I just have sex with you?"

"I think you just had sex in my general vicinity," says Kris, "if that makes you feel more comfortable."

"A little, yeah," says Anoop. "We aren't telling Matt about this, right?"

"You have my word," Kris promises him. "He won't hear it from me. If he gets it out of you after a few drinks, though, I can't be held responsible for that."

"That's probably fair," says Anoop, rubbing his hand against his thighs awkwardly. Kris passes him a box of kleenex out of sheer sympathy a moment later. "I'm going to...get dressed."

"Okay," says Kris, and reaches for the rest of his own clothes too. He's cool enough to be comfortable getting dressed now, his shirt not even sticking to his skin. Though he has to admit he's a little turned on again, in spite of the workout, watching Anoop and the machine go at it. He can't help it, though. Sex is sexy, no matter who's having it. And, apparently, with what.

"I'm supposed to go over some paperwork for my internship," says Anoop as he buttons his pants, looking away from Kris as he finishes getting his clothes on. "Summer's coming so fast. I'm supposed to fax it back this weekend."

"I can't believe I'm not going to see you guys for over three months," says Kris. "It's going to be weird." Weirder than last summer, when Kris was giving up his college life but not his _home_ to go live with his parents for the summer. But he has a summer job back in his hometown and it's too good an opportunity to refuse.

"I see how it is," says Anoop. "You use me and then take off for the summer."

"I'm pretty sure the machine's the one who used you, if you want to get technical about it," says Kris. "And I'm not really taking off if you know where I am."

"You won't be _here_ ," says Anoop. "That's what taking off for the summer means."

Kris is subletting his room to a girl named Katy—he didn't choose her entirely based on the name, but it didn't hurt. What can he say? Katies are trustworthy, to him—and Cale promises to make sure she's comfortable there. Which means no initiations, Kris was adamant about that. No pranks and definitely no naked barbecues.

Next summer, Kris vows, next summer he's going to find a local job, because it's nice going back to visit his family and the town where he grew up, but this is his home and his life now, and it gets harder and harder to leave that behind.

"I'm not leaving _today_ or anything," says Kris. "We still have finals to get through. You're just feeling clingy because we just had sex."

"We didn't—" Anoop starts, then shakes his head at him. "We're still going out tomorrow night, right? You and me and Steve?"

"And Steve's buddy Whatshisname and Jim and Mike too, I think," says Kris. "I don't know. The group keeps growing. But yeah, we're for sure still going out."

"Okay," says Anoop. "Okay, good. I'll see you then."

"See? You'll totally see me again before I go," says Kris, and he feels like he should give him a kiss or a hug or something before he goes, but it wasn't like that exactly and it would probably make Anoop feel weird so he just gives him a smile and a wave and heads back downstairs.

It's definitely going to be weird leaving for the summer, but he knows he has an awesome group of friends to come back to.


End file.
